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June 28, 2004
YOU CAN TAKE THE GIRL OUT OF THE TRAILER PARK...
You know, I'm like most guys. Faced with a pretty girl, I'm pretty much willing to cut her a break... or two... or twenty-seven. Stuff that you wouldn't put up with from anyone else suddenly seems much less annoying. I know it's superficial, but at least I admit it.
That said, Britney Spears is quickly living her way off of my "laminated top ten list." She's still hot, don't get me wrong. But she's quickly approaching daytime television territory, and she's running out of breaks.
The "let's get some cheap attention by kissing a woman -- who by the way is old enough to be my mom" stunt, I could live with... despite the slightly creepy age thing, there was still enough of the girl-girl titilation thing to be overlooked. (By the way, please don't ask me why men find that whole thing intriguing or why it works... it just does. None of us can explain it, it just does.) However, starting with the whole running-off-to-Vegas-to-get-married-for-55-hours thing, she's been sliding toward Springerville. And this week's revelation that she's engaged to a man who left the pregnant-again mother of his child girlfriend for Britney -- and that Britney herself is probably knocked up -- well... I'm trying to figure out which show she's auditioning for: Maury, Ricki, or Jerry.
She's doing nothing for my impression of Southerners. And let me make one thing very clear: Britney's not trash because of her wardrobe, she's trash because of her behavior. She's descending the slippery Michael Jackson slope: where your behavior becomes so outlandish and stupid that even your fans give up on you forever - you get too "out there" to ever win them back.
Britney, honey... go back to writhing in barely-there outfits but still publicly maintaining your purity. You're quickly erasing the only difference between you and Christina Aguilera.
