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July 19, 2004
NACHO, NACHO MAN... I WANNA BE A NACHO MAN
Like I've said before, sometimes these posts write themselves. I spent 20 minutes trying to come up with a funny add-on to this story, and I just couldn't do it.
A man was arrested on his 23rd birthday after a police officer saw him nude and covered with nacho cheese from a pool snack bar.
Michael P. Monn was arrested early Sunday in the parking lot outside the pool. An officer saw a nude man carrying a box of Frito Lay snacks and a container of nacho cheese run toward a Jeep in the lot and stopped him.
"The male had nacho cheese in his hair, on his face and on his shoulders," Maryville Police Department officer Scott Spicer reported. "The nude male had a strong odor of alcohol and was semi-incoherent."
Okay, you know what really worries me about this story? That the guy was described as semi-incoherent. Frankly, I'd feel much, much better if he was just described as being totally incoherent. Because if he had even 1% of his faculties together, then this story has become totally disturbing - some might even say cheesy. (Oh, don't tell me that was a bad joke. It's nacho place to say so.)
Someone lock up all the Taco Bells. Please.
