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August 17, 2004
50 BEST MOVIES LINES OF ALL TIME: #40-#36
Okay, I admit it... I wanted to lie and put "What we have here is... failure to communicate" on this list. But I haven't seen Cool Hand Luke. So props go out to a great line that would be on this list if I'd seen the movie. On to the countdown...
40. "Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country." -- General George Patton (George C. Scott), PATTON (1970)
The ultimate soldier's movie, Patton contains the iconic imagery of George C. Scott standing in front of the giant American flag and rallying his troops. And this line sums up, for me anyway, the roll-up-our-sleeves, no-nonsense attitude of the man, the character and the film. In one line, Scott as Patton neatly removes the glory from war and reduces it to simple strategy -- which was and remains the key to victory in war. Stripped of pretense and hyperbole, war is about survival; remove the idealism, and it's really just a question of being smarter than the other guy. I don't know if the real Patton said it, but if he did it was a brilliant leadership line.
39. "Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me." Benjamin Braddock (Dustin Hoffman), THE GRADUATE (1967)
Okay, so it's one that everybody cites. Fine. But cliches become cliches for a reason. And while "Plastics" probably sums up the spirit of The Graduate a little better than this one... the scene between Hoffman and Bancroft is an iconic one in cinema history. This scene made the movie, and launched Dustin Hoffman onto the A-list. An all-time classic line that can't be missing from any list such as this one.
38. "Okay... sick as a dog. Gonna vomit." -- Dr. Evil (Mike Myers), AUSTIN POWERS: THE SPY WHO SHAGGED ME (1999)
Which Austin Powers line makes the cut? Like several other movies represented on this list, there are so many great lines in them that selecting one turns out to be a labor of love, as you try and think of the one line that either summed up the movie for you or simply made you laugh the hardest.
In this case, I had to go with Dr. Evil battling his mechanical chair, spinning maniacally while calling for a young priest and an old priest... then finally stopping, doubling over, slowly slurring out his intentions and spitting on the floor. In a movie -- and a series -- full of lines that crack me up to no end, this scene and this line are the surest bets to keep making me laugh even when I'm seeing the film for the 200th time.
37. "I'm gonna make you squeal like a pig. Weeeeeeee!" -- Mountain Man (Bill McKinney), DELIVERANCE (1972)
Disagree with me? Think I'm sick? Okay, then name me another line from another film that so quickly and clearly evokes a feeling and a specific image. Go on, I'm waiting. Give me another line that so instantly takes anyone who's ever seen it directly into the air and atmosphere of the scene.
Anyone who's ever seen Deliverance -- and even most people who haven't -- know exactly the scene this line calls to mind... and the line instantly draws shudders and nervous giggles every time someone says it aloud. What do you call it when even people who haven't seen the movie can get the exact image and feeling of a scene, just from hearing one line repeated? Great writing.
36. "So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!" -- Howard Beale (Peter Finch), NETWORK (1976)
My, my, my... how prescient and on target Network now is! But back in 1976, the idea of a network merging its news department with its entertainment division in order to turn a greater profit and boost ratings seemed more satirical than realistic. The idea of putting a man on the air as he goes insane seemed to be a statement, not an observation.
In the film, Finch plays a network TV anchor who learns he's about to be fired. Fuming, he declares that he'll commit suicide on live national television on his last broadcast. Allowed one last chance on the air to apologize, he goes on a further rant about the nature of the media "business." Rather than take him off the air, execs give him his own show to rant about how bad the network is -- and ratings skyrocket. (View a trailer here.)
28 years later, this "message film" about the dangers of the ratings=seeking media seems more a warning of things to come than a satire; more a sadly accurate tragedy than black comedy. Maybe we all need to go to our windows, open them, stick our heads out and yell, "I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!"
