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January 08, 2006
I Want To Thank The Gonademy...
In resopnse to Doc, who thinks I went a little bit soft with today's other entry, here's a quick piece of much harder news... the adult video awards were handed out this past weekend, and received mainstream attention. (Question: Do these awards have nicknames? I mean, instead of the "Oscars," are these the "Jimmies?" The "Dicks?" Just curious.)
But unlike the Golden Globes and Emmys, the goody bag contained "Barely Legal" playing cards and Hustler condoms, and the stars such as Arnold Schwartzenpecker and Britney Rears were not quite household names..
Okay, I'll give the Britney chick some credit; that's a funny nom de... er... nom de boom.
The 23rd annual Adult Video News Awards... boasted a higher attendance than ever this year, with more than 5,000 watching Saturday night's two-hour-long event in a huge ballroom at the ritzy Venetian Hotel.
Couldn't they have found something else to call it, even for one night, besides "huge ballroom?"
The winners were as earnest and even as tearful as their Hollywood counterparts in their appreciation of the glass trophies they took home, and works such as "A Day Without Whores" and "Big Butt Road Trip" won fulsome praise.
Something tells me I'd have been in tears too, had I worked on something called "Big Butt Road Trip." Anyone else besides me wondering exactly what shape those glass trophies were? And what were the speeches liike? "I'd like thank my fluffer for always being there for me -- you're the best!"
Ron Jeremy, a portly p0rn superstar, pledged to keep delivering the goods for his fans.
Now I can sleep better at night.
Adult entertainment... shot mainly in Southern California's San Fernando Valley, racked up estimated sales of $12.6 billion in 2005, according to statistics compiled by AVN. That compared with U.S. theatrical revenue of $8.9 billion for mainstream Hollywood films, according to figures from box office tracking firm Exhibitor Relations.
$12.6 billion? Something tells me that's not all just teenage boys in their parents' basements, or guys in polyester who refer to themselves as "The" something. ("The Jack-meister." "The Larrynator." "The Big Lebowksi." You get the idea.) We're spending more on adult entertainment as a country than the GDP of many countries -- not just small ones either, but countries like Hungary, Mexico, Russia and Thailand.
It's insight like this that keeps you coming back to me, I know.
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Comments
I have to tell you, it was just nice to get nominated.
Posted by: The SpinMD at January 9, 2006 07:24 AM
12.6 Billion? That's a huge flippin' wad of cash.
Posted by: Sarah at January 9, 2006 10:30 AM
I think "gonads" is one of the most underused words in the english language. I'm going to use it at least 5 times today. I'll let you know how it goes.
Posted by: thebeav at January 11, 2006 09:36 AM
How'd that gonad thing work out for ya?
Posted by: Curmudgeon at January 12, 2006 11:49 AM
