The Chronic Curmudgeon

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July 31, 2006

Mudge's Favorite 134 Songs of the 80s: The 80s of the 80s

Okay... I know I'm going to take grief for a lot of the ones in this fivesome. But here they are, songs 85-81 on my list -- the 80s of the 80s, if you will.

85. Patience, Guns N Roses GnR make their second appearance of many on this list, with the song that proved that they could do sensitive and acoustic just as well as they could rock out. How many of you out there ended up steaming up some car windows or making your roommate leave the dorm room for a while because of this song? I thought so. This is one of the 80s' best ballads -- and musically, it's as impressive as anything GnR ever did. Check the video here.

84. Games Without Frontiers, Peter Gabriel Okay, so it took me until basically when I started researching this list to figure out that what Gabriel says behind the bridge between verses is "Jeux sans frontieres" (French for "games without frontiers") and not "She's so funky, yeah" -- which, in hindsight makes absolutely no sense in this song whatsoever. Put this one on my own personal "most embarrassingly misheard lyrics" list. But the song, one of Gabriel's pre-So best from the turn of the decade, goes on the list no matter how badly I mis-sung the lyrics all these years. Check the video here.

83. Every Rose Has Its Thorn, Poison Okay, you'll give me hell for this one, given that it is the quintessential hair ballad. But for all of you who are about to bust me... look us all in the eye and try to pretend with a straight face that you didn't once think this song poetry; that you weren't right there with your lighter thrust into the air, or slow dancing at the junior high school dance, or weeping into the night over whichever him or her this song reminded you of. Just try to tell us that you weren't right there. Uh huh. That's what I thought. So spray the AquaNet, tighten your bandana, cinch up those acid wash jeans, thrust your lighters in the air, and sing it with me... and check the video here.

82. I Know What Boys Like, The Waitresses What sad foreshadowing... Patty Donahue, the lead singer of the Waitresses, opens this video with a drag of the cigarettes that eventually killed her in 1996 (she died at only 40 of lung cancer, brought on by years of heavy smoking). There's a lesson in there, kiddies. Anyway, I always loved the way Patty sneered and taunted her way through this song... so self-satisfied, so teasing, so amused... she captured the spirit of the song perfectly. The line after the third and last bridge, when she sneers, "sucker!" and giggles evil-ly... perfect for the song. Nice job, Patty... shame you had to leave so soon. Check the video here.

81. They Don't Know, Tracey Ullman The purest pop song anywhere on my list. There's no escaping it -- it's pure sugar bubblegum. And I still like it. Comedienne Tracey Ullman was just getting started and attracting attention in 1984 when she covered this 50s revival song by Kirsty Maccoll, whose backing tracks were simply kept and re-laid behind Tracey's vocals and the new instrumental track. The song is an ode to those couples who no one understood... (like Ric Ocasek and Paulina Porizkova? Britney and K-Fed?) ... where the guy doesn't meet anyone's expectations or approval for the girl, but she loves him anyway, despite what everyone says. (We all knew at least one couple like that in high school, too -- where the boy from the wrong side of the tracks and who everyone thinks is going to be a bum when he gets older somehow ends up with the girl who could have been a cheerleader... I actually Googled the one from my high school tonight out of curiosity. No luck. Oh well.

Anyway, Ullman had a pretty good voice for someone who was making singing her second career. She was kinda cute, too, in that 60s throwback look. Add in a cameo from a Beatle at the end of the video (even if it was the most shamelessly self-promoting Beatle), and you had a one hit wonder by a famous comedian that is better than King Tut. Give me hell for digging a piece of bubblegum if you want, but "They Don't Know" makes #81 on my list.

Posted by Christopher on July 31, 2006 09:56 PM

Comments

Posted by: Marquette Hoops at August 1, 2006 10:53 AM