February 13, 2007
More Unintentional Censorship
I did it again. I get about 1000 spamments a day (this is not an exaggeration and is the reason why I would support the death penalty for spam perpetrators). In the process of trying to eliminate them, I not only deleted some legit comments that hadn't been posted yet, but also just accidentally deleted about 100 legit comments that had already been posted. Some of them appeared to be critical of me or my taste in music or my political positions, which is fine ... and now it looks to a casual observer that I deleted a bunch of comments that I didn't like.
Which isn't true.
Sorry for the unintentional censorship. Stupid forkin' spammers deserve to die in the most painful ways imaginable.
Posted by Christopher at 12:37 AM | Comments (0)January 20, 2007
A Tragic De-Spamming Accident
On Friday, I got hit with more than 2000 spamments. (Once again, I call for the immediate eradication from this earth of anyone who has ever programmed or used a comment bot. Maybe the Norse god Holler can pay them a visit.) Of the 2200+ spamments, about 300 made it past my increasingly ineffective filter. As I was trying to exterminate the infestation, I forgot that I was on the "approved comments" page of my site manager -- thought I was still seeding through "junk" comments -- and accidentally hit "delete all" for the 100 comments on that page. This resulted in the accidental deletion of about 60 legit comments from you all, pretty much everything after the dead pool entry (and including some of those).
Apologies to everyone whose thoughts I have inadvertently erased.
Posted by Christopher at 12:10 PM | Comments (0)January 12, 2007
National De-Lurking Week
Work is kicking my rather broad butt these days... so in lieu of a real post, I'll just remind you all that this is National De-Lurking Week -- when you're all supposed to come out of your holes and if you see your shadows, we get six more weeks of the winter we haven't even had yet.
Wait... maybe it's just that you're supposed to actually sound off like you got a pair, and let me (and the rest of us in this little community) know that you're here by commenting and saying hello. In other words, don't just read... say something. You know... de-lurk.
Who's in da hizzouse?
Posted by Christopher at 08:09 AM | Comments (0)January 01, 2007
New Year's Wishes
My new year's wishes for the famous and the not-so-much:
To all of you, I wish peace, prosperity, happiness and a continued good sense of humor. Thank you for being my blog-family.
To Corey, Jennifer, and Sarah… I wish peace of mind and knowledge of self. Each has, on their blogs and in their own way, a soul-search in process… and I wish for them that they find who they like and like who they find.
To TG, I wish a better second act than any Broadway playwright could dream up.
To the dollar, I wish more familiarity with me in the coming year. I hope for you that we grow to be really good friends.
To the people of the Middle East – Arab and Israeli, Muslim and Jew, Palestinian and Iraqi, Sunni and Shi’ite… I wish a year of sanity when you all finally put down the damn guns, stop exploding the bombs, stop building fences and start building bridges. You may never be friends, but I wish for you all that you could live in peace. (It’ll never happen, I know, but I wish it for you just the same.)
To New York City… I wish another year of peace and safety. You’re a target by virtue of your very existence. And while US “leadership” has gone out of its way both internationally (diluting the war on al-Qaeda by making up reasons to divert resources and effort into the Iraq invasion) and domestically (cutting your self-defense budget in favor of places like Louisville and Omaha), the city itself has remained defiant and proud. I will never be a “New Yorker,” but I’ve made my peace with you and you with me.
To Britney Spears: I wish a Undie-of-the-Week Club membership from Victoria’s Secret… and a “pay for two weeks, get one free” special at the Betty Ford Clinic.
To Paris Hilton, I wish some talent. At anything. (For those of you who saw her infamous home tape, you know that she didn’t even display any discernable talent in that effort either.)
To Tom Cruise, I wish a deprogramming intervention. To Katie Holmes, I wish an endowed surrogate. To “Baby Suri,” I wish DYFS.
To Fergie, I wish a face that looked less like a man’s, a comb, and an etiquette class from Emily Post or someone similar, to remind you of how to respect yourself in your behavior and speech. Your "music" is insipid, inane, demeaning and vapid.
To Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid, I wish the perceptiveness to realize that theirs is power on loan only, and that we’ll take it back as easily as we gave it. I also wish them the wisdom to know what’s right for the country and for our world, and the fortitude to do it.
To George W. Bush, Antonin Scalia, Samuel Alito, Gary Bauer, James Dobson, and Ann Coulter, I wish a quail hunting trip with Dick Cheney.
To Tom DeLay, Rob Ney, and Mark Foley, I wish a cozy cell with a cell-mate named Razor who likes the weight room and idolizes Boggs from “The Shawshank Redemption.”
To Con Edison, I wish competence. I’ve been at this townhouse since Memorial Day. Today was my fifth power outage of more than three hours. If any business that didn’t have a monopoly demonstrated as much incompetence as you do, they’d be out of business.
To Major League Baseball, I wish the sanity to impose salary caps and floors, so that the Yankees, Mets and Red Sox can’t buy post-season contention every year, while the owners in Kansas City, Pittsburgh and Tampa can’t line their pockets with revenue shared from the big markets instead of trying to improve their teams.
To Barry Bonds, I wish a perjury indictment right as you reach 753 home runs, only 400 of which were legitimate. Cheating asshat.
To Michael Vick, I wish you whatever new head coach you want. Because despite the fact that no one in football has supported you like Jim Mora did, you turned on him late in the season. So I wish for you that you get whatever coach you want. Because when you do, you’ll have no one to blame but yourself… and maybe then you’ll figure out that no “quarterback” who rushes for 1,000 yards in a season is a real NFL quarterback. You’re a running back who lines up under center, and no team with you as “quarterback” will ever win a championship.
To the NCAA, I wish the sense to eliminate 2/3 of the useless, uninteresting, chase-the-money bowl games that no one cares about and that make it possible for 6-6 teams to play in the post-season. There ought to be 10 bowls, for the 20 best teams in the country: Rose, Orange, Sugar, Fiesta, Cotton, Gator, Sun, Independence, Liberty, and Sun. We can erase the Independence Bowl and re-insert the one on New Year’s Day in Orlando IF you force the BS corporate sponsorship out of there and re-name it the Tangerine Bowl like it’s supposed to be. No bowl game that is named after its corporate sponsor should ever be allowed to be played again.
To George Steinbrenner, I wish a case of sudden-onset dysentery. And a 57-105 record.
To March Madness, I wish more Cinderellas like George Mason.
To the family of Darrent Williams and the families of all urban violence victims, I wish peace and tranquility and the end of the killing.
To our planet, I wish a year of us taking better care of you, and of no longer ignoring the warning signs you’ve been conveying to us for decades now but especially in the last few years. We don’t mean to be willfully ignorant of you (well, some of us do, but they’re called Republicans), and I wish for you that we lower your fever and start doing things to heal you.
Posted by Christopher at 09:37 PM | Comments (0)December 23, 2006
Welcome Back
An old friend of this blog and of the Mudge himself has resurfaced on her blog, and I wanted to point y'all her way.
You may recall my friend Sarah -- "A Distrubingly Cynical College Student" -- from her blog, "The Underground Devil." Or, you may recall her from the story of "how we met" -- namely, that she is the teenage daughter of a good friend of mine from work... and that more than two years ago now, she was inspired as a high school senior to begin blogging on her own after reading my blog and feeling that it was worthy of emulation. (Give her a break; she's young and has plenty of time to figure out that I'm a charlatan!) Seriously, that's about the highest praise I think a blogger can receive -- that someone else was moved to begin blogging after reading you -- and she still, even today, referred to me in her post as her "hero."
So I obviously have a fondness for this person who is an amazingly talented writer in her own right. I mean, seriously... she's 19 now and is miles ahead of where I was at 19, or where I suppose most of us were at 19. When I say that I want this young lady to have a career in writing somehow, it's not the usual supportive encouragement thing that we all start dispensing as soon as someone younger than us asks for advice. I mean, I think we'll all be the better for it if she is able to find a way to make a career from her gifts. Sarah and I have become friends on blog and on IM, and the deepening of that friendship has also led to a stronger friendship with her entire family. It's been my privilege to have dinner with their family, and her father and I talk more frequently than our jobs might otherwise let us because of her influence.
She's had her share of shit in the past few months. I don't use that word lightly; as regular readers here know, I usually temper my language here and put a p where the h goes, mostly out of an imagined conceit that my real-world name might accidentally someday get connected to my Mudge persona's blog, and a desire to keep a minor sense of decorum or propriety here just in case I get found out. But there's no other word to accurately describe what's been thrown in her path these past few months. (I'll let her tell you in her own words, from her post today.) I've known what's been going on, and have been occasionally chatting with her on IM through it... and every time I do, I've been pushing Sarah to start blogging again. This is partly because I believe that people who at their core are writers... well, they need to write, as self-therapy, as a coping mechanism, and just because it's what writers do. And partly it's because, selfishly, I just like her writing and miss it.
Today, she finally had enough of the badgering and hopped back on the blog, despite feeling that she has nothing much to say right now. (Gosh, there's a rash of that going around right now, isn't there??) I'm hoping she'll keep up with it; I'm hoping y'all will head over to wish her well and reward her bravery by providing her a renewed readership. And Sarah? Thanks for having the guts to start writing again right now. You inspire me too.
Posted by Christopher at 12:40 AM | Comments (0)November 06, 2006
Blog Etiquette Question
For everyone out there who has their own blog... a quick question of etiquette for you. How long should you let a blog be dark before it's okay to remove it from your blogroll? If the last post was... six months ago? Four months? Two? How long is sufficiently quiet before you feel like you're not insulting anyone by deleting them?
Posted by Christopher at 07:51 AM | Comments (5)October 26, 2006
Thursday Ten
1. The conference last week in California went great -- my talk seems to have gone over very well, and it was a really good slate of other speakers. I don't always enjoy the conferences I get invited to, but this one was good. It's always nice when your session is a hit.
2. The wedding in San Jose over the weekend was even better. Both the bride and groom -- both long-time friends of mine -- are by their own admission a little "out there" and non-traditional... and this ceremony fit the couple getting married better than perhaps any wedding I have ever gone to. Non-traditional is an understatement: eschewing convention entirely, this was a non-religious ceremony -- and the theme of both the wedding and the reception was: tiki party! I haven't ever attended a wedding in a camp shirt and sandals before... nor have I ever seen a bride and groom marry in flip-flops. It was wonderfully festive and reflective of the couple's personality and beliefs, and I don't know if I have ever had so much fun at a wedding.
3. I'm on a panel this afternoon in Manhattan with some other pretty big players in the business blogging world... I always get a little more nervous when there's "big hitters" on the docket with me, hoping I can hold my own with them -- so wish me luck.
4. I must have been linked to yesterday from somewhere; my daily traffic doubled from its average. Unexpected spikes are fun.
5. It might well have been a Black Eyed Peas fan site that linked to me; I got more than a couple of flame comments for my having dissed the band and for my apparently errant belief that "Where Is The Love?" was their first single (it most definitely apparently was not).
6. I have a lot of thinking to do in the coming few weeks – about what matters to me, about geography, about what I want. Having the world as your oyster can be overwhelming at times. Good problem to have, but still overwhelming.
7. It isn’t helping that everyone else who’s affected by my decisions is taking the high road, telling me to put myself first and do what’s best for me and what I feel is right. The big dummies were supposed to make it easier for me.
8. So we're going to put up a fence to keep people out (but only on our southern border). Wonder how many of the chuckleheads calling for that move would be here in America if immigration standards had always been as strict as the ones they want today. Don't get me wrong; illegal immigration is a problem. But putting up a wall to keep people out just feels un-American to me. (My family emigrated to the US around 1906 or so... wonder what was being said about Eastern European immigrants 100 years ago?)
9. Please vote on November 7. A bipartisan group of celebrities at One.org requests it too.
10. Trigonometry continues to kick my ass.
Posted by Christopher at 08:30 AM | Comments (6)October 15, 2006
Hawaii Earthquake
In case you haven't heard, there was a major earthquake in Hawaii this afternoon (morning their time). While there is no tsunami and no reports of injuries or deaths, there are power outages all over the state and some reports of damage.
Our blogging friend Linkmeister is based in Hawaii. Obviously, he's going to be busy with many other priorities for the next few hours or days... but LM, we're thinking of you and hoping that everything is all right at your home. Good luck... thoughts and prayers and all.
Posted by Christopher at 05:35 PM | Comments (2)October 13, 2006
Update
I meant to write a lot of things last night; instead I watched baseball and then fell asleep. Tonight is p0ker night, so no new posts until Saturday morning. What will I write about? Well, there's a commenter who asked -- nay, demanded -- to be published, and I'll be ever-so-happy to comply. Beyond that, there's a few possiblilities:
-- Through Eden, I found the IMing with God-bot. If I can get it to have anything resembling an amusing interaction, I might have fun with that.
-- The world is still full of idiots -- Chris Shays highest among them right now -- and I may feel the need to poke holes in some of them.
-- I need to release my votes (as if I had any) for the major baseball awards.
-- Tim has been after me to issue my own take on this list from Blender magazine. I might just have to.
Anyone with suggestions as to what I should blog about on Saturday while waiting for my bookcases to finally be delivered, please issue them in the comments below.
Posted by Christopher at 07:16 AM | Comments (7)September 26, 2006
Hooray For Boobies, 2006
As we all know, I am a fan of breasteses. (Aren't we all?)
But take the raging hormonal juvenile teenager out of the Mudge and get serious for a moment... breast cancer isn't a giggling matter. It impacts millions of women in the United States alone -- more than 212,000 cases will be diagnosed this year. Thankfully, 87 of every 100 women diagnosed will become five-year survivors; but that still means that 13 of every 100 women diagnosed -- more than 26,000 in 2006 alone -- will eventually succumb to the disease. It's not just a female disease -- men can get it too -- but even when it afflicts women, it affects us as men; these women are our wives, girlfriends, mothers, daughters, sisters, and our friends. The disease will eventually touch almost all of us... personally, in the last two years I have had a member of my extended family and two good friends battling the disease. Fighting breast cancer is personal to me. And I suspect to many of you as well.
Every autumn there is a unqiue effort in the blogosphere... a chance for us all to both celebrate breasts and the women to whom they belong, and to contribute to the fight against breast cancer. The BoobieThon has raised more than $25,000 for the Susan Komen Foundation, including more than $9000 last year. This year, the Boobie-Thon begins on Sunday, October 1, and runs through Saturday October 7. I'm proud to be supporting the effort again this year.
The concept is simple; bloggers of all genders (but as you'd expect, most of them are women) submit 'rack shots' -- either clothed or unclothed -- to the site, in an effort to draw attention to the cause and solicit donations. If you just visit the site without donating, you get the clothed shots. For a $50 donation, you get the full glory views (anonymous, of course -- no faces are allowed). And far from being mere "cheap thrills" (and be honest... aren't cheap thrills half the fun of the Internet anyway?), this week-long celebration of amateur bodies of all shapes and sizes raises money for a tremendously worthy cause. I encourage all of you, whatever your gender or persuasion, to support the effort with a donation -- of your money, of your rack, or both -- and help them get to $10,000 this year.
I'll be sending in a photo along with my money -- let's face it... I probably can give a few of the girls a run for their money ;-) -- and I encourage all of you to do the same. Again, all juvenility and copping a peek aside, this is for a worthy cause, and I urge you to donate to BoobieThon 2006 in the name of a woman in your life -- whether she's been afflicted with breast cancer or not.
Posted by Christopher at 09:42 PM | Comments (3)Pets
For those of you who have pets at home, give 'em an extra cuddle, pet, milkbone, treat, nibble, whatever it is you give them when they're good or when you just want to give them some luvin's. Do it in memory of Eden and Hawk's dog, Jake, who crossed Rainbow Bridge last night and will be watching over his family from somewhere else now.
I'm a total softie for animals, as anyone who's read me for any length of time knows. I love all animals, my charity donations are almost all for animals (with one exception, see the post coming a little later tonight), and generally I'll have a soft spot for any animal from chipmunk to whale. So reading this entry really got to me... and J.D. Salinger, the Curmudgeonly Cat, got extra treats and cuddles tonight as a result. Godspeed, Jakedog.
Posted by Christopher at 09:29 PM | Comments (2)September 15, 2006
2000 Flushes -- I Mean Comments
At some point today, assuming somebody comments on one of my posts today, this blog will receive its 2000th non-spam comment since migrating over to Moveable Type in May 2005. (If I were to included the comment spammers, we'd be looking at about 10,000... have I mentioned lately how desperately I want comment spammers to die painful, horrible, torturous deaths?)
2000 times in the past 16 months, someone has been moved to say something about what I've written. True, many times it's my friends taking occasion to take playful public shots at me, and there've been plenty of times where I've take the easy way out by tossing up a YouTube video, adding a sentence or two about it, and then sitting back to let something else drive the dialogue on my site rather than my words or thoughts. But not always. Sometimes, much to my amazement to this day, people read the stuff I ramble about and actually care enough, are amsued enought, or get cheesed off enough to write something back. Which is humbling as a writer/blogger; even though the whole point of writing is the deep-seated belief that someone, somewhere, someday might read it... it still surprises me to realize that people sometimes really are reading -- and being reached in whatever way enough to get them to respond. Cool.
I could do something cheap in a blatant attempt to encourage comments, like promise a prize to the 2000th commenter. But unless one is initiating a comment orgy a la Jill (which I haven't yet had the stones to do because, well, I fear my readers... and because I frankly don't think there's enough of you left for me to actually make it to 100), doing a post that explicitly asks for comments is cheap... like saying "I spent all day in the kitchen making this meal for you, skipping my dialysis treatments and therapy sessions just for you... so how do you like the zucchini mousse?" It's fishing for compliments. And I shan't sully the spirit of this blog by engaging in such trite and obvious efforts (he said, feigning much pomposity).
So instead, I'll just say thank you.
Posted by Christopher at 06:58 AM | Comments (7)September 09, 2006
Quick Shout Out
You know how sometimes life sneaks up and kicks you in the unkickables (or shouldn't be kickables, anyway)? Well, such a stretch seems to have settled upon a new blog-friend of mine, Jennifer over at Open Book. We made each other's acquaintance during the recent 80s countdown, and true to what happens so often in the blogosphere, when I started going over to her site I realized just how many better-writers-than-me are out there in the world. Her stuff is contemplative, poignant, and definitely worth reading -- even if I was too intimidated to offer comments very often. ;-)
Unfortunately, my recommendation of her (which I'd been planning on doing for a while) is coming too late; family crises have required that she concentrate her energies on the offline world for a while. But - as a favor to me - if you're so inclined, go over to her last entry, "Pause," and just send some good vibes her way. We all have these lousy stretches in life, and god knows a little extra support goes a long way during those times, even if we don't know the folks lending it. So just wish her well -- and when she returns, I definitely recommend reading her.
Good luck with everything, Jennifer. It'll all work out. We all wish you well.
Posted by Christopher at 12:08 PM | Comments (2)September 06, 2006
Back In The Saddle Again
After a cheap and easy fix that seems too simple to work yet so far appears to be holding up, I am back on the blog. Tomorrow night I will be at the Aerosmith/Motley Crue concert in Hartford (man, I have become one of those annoying people who keeps going to see bands that were big when he was young, long after their prime... oh well, what the hell -- it's going to be fun, so what do I care?), so I won't be able to actually blog until Friday.
But in my absence, I leave you this clip that Tim brought to my attention... MSNBC's Keith Olbermann (who I loved on SportsCenter back in the day and who is rapidly earning my trust and admiration for being one of the few journalists/commentators left who actually stands up to conservatives instead of rolling over and allowing himself to be steamrolled by them and spewing out Republican/conservative propaganda like 98% of the rest of the media these days) standing up to that fascist demagogue Donald Rumsfeld. You know, between his taking Bill "UnAmerican Piece of Garbage" O'Reilly to the woodshed earlier this year for lying about the details of the Malmody massacre and villifying Americans who were in fact butchered by the Nazis that day, and his being willing to point out exactly what a totalitarian dingleberry that Rumsfeld is, Olbermann's at his best when lashing out in righteous indignation at conservative outrages. One of the only good ones we have left, ladies and gentleman, who's earning his place at the table with Murrow (whom he cites in this clip). Enjoy, and I'll catch up to you later this week.
Posted by Christopher at 11:14 PM | Comments (3)August 01, 2006
A (Hopefully) Short Hiatus
Hate to do this, but here's the situation: just 11 days after making the last payment on my laptop, it's got issues; there's something loose in the socket area where the electrical cord gets plugged in. Keeping the power on AC is a challenge, and the whole area heats up like a global warming summer's day. Frankly, I am surprised it hasn't burst into flame already.
So I need to take it back to Best Buy and get it fixed -- depending on the cost, anyway. Hopefully, it'll only be a couple o days, and my hiatus from the Mudge blog will be short. BUT ... here's the kicker: like a stupid, I bookmarked my admin space for this blog past the password. I haven't actually entered the password in a year or more. I frankly don't remember it, or even my user name. So not only can I not get to it from any other computer... but if this one costs too much to repair and it makes more sense to get a new one, it could be a while before I manage to track down just what the hell my user name and password are. So this little hiatus could end up being a little longer than I thought.
Yeah, I know. I'm an idiot.
Anyway, I hope to be back as soon as my computer's fixed. Shouldn't be too long. Everybody stay cool in this heat.
Posted by Christopher at 09:32 PM | Comments (1)July 29, 2006
Bloggiversary
It's the ultimate conceit, I suppose, that we bloggers have -- that anyone cares about a specific date on the calendar upon which we finally took the plunge and began for whatever reasons to put our thoughts and experiences out there for the world to see ... and respond to. But because we are linear beings, we do focus on dates, arbitrary though they are. And because we do, bloggers tend to note their bloggiversary as an event worthy of noting. For me, July 29 is that date; today is my three year bloggiversary.
It's become cliche almost, to say "I started this blog for writing practice." Funny how that is ... the people I've found to be the best writers are the ones who say they need practice. Funny, but telling, I suppose. But such is the story of how TCC came to be. Being a corporate speechwriter was beginning to make me feel a little, I dunno, stifled when it came to exercising my creativity. So with Doc's encouragement and without much fanfare, I started jotting down thoughts and recounting tales.
I will spare you the extended soliloquy about how I can't believe that this little tool of writing practice has morphed into my 15 minutes and big career break; even I've grown a little tired of that legend. But I do have to acknowledge that virtually everything about my life today is related to having started this blog. It's not exaggeration to say that nothing in my life would be what it is today if I hadn't started TCC three years ago today; it's just fact. This blog has gotten me promotions, gotten me stamps on my passport, led to getting me the newspaper clippings that now hang framed on the wall near my desk.. it's helped me buy a nicer car, move to a nicer home, it's gotten me friends, gotten me opportunities... hell, it's even gotten me dates. Pretty damned amazing. Life's a trip, ain't it?
In the past three years, I've written about anything and everything. It's hard to narrow it down to few favorite posts from the lifetime of TCC, but I do have some that I particularly enjoy looking back on. For example, I love that I will forever have a written-the-next-day perspective on what it was like to be in Boston the night the Red Sox won the World Series in 2004. And recounting stories from vacations past gives me a window to remember the week of Dave's wedding or getting hit on for group sex by a Greek-Israeli immigrant in a surf shop on the North Carolina shore.
I've been able to tell my dad things I find too hard to say in person. I finally put down in words my thoughts on the Kennedy assassination after getting to spend three years in the mid-90s being paid to investigate it. I remembered being in suburban New York on September 11, 2001.
As the Mudge, I have often shared muscial thoughts -- on musical heroes who've passed, on new bands I've discovered, and on coming to terms with no longer being musically hip. I've occasionally tried to be funny -- and while I usually fail miserably, there've been a couple of times where I think I might have come close.
I've done plenty of navel gazing on this blog, from retelling the legend-in-my-own-mind story about moving east to seek my fortune to daydreaming during a very rough stretch of my life about where my ultimate escape might be, to freaking out about having to grow up and at least play at being a corporate professional, to not knowing what to do with myself now that I'm actually successful and not just trying to work my way up anymore. I've said goodbye to childhood heroes. I've said goodbye to blog friends.
Along the way, I met all of you. Some of you I knew in person already; some I have since met; some I will meet in person in November at the Philadelphia 8K; and some of you I will likely never meet in person. But all of you have contributed to the success of this blog, and by extension the successes in my life since I started it. So instead of celebrating the existence of my silly little corner of blogtopia (y! sctp), I'll close by celelbrating your place in my corner of the world. Thank you for reading, friends.
Posted by Christopher at 01:10 AM | Comments (9)June 02, 2006
Warning: Authentication Coming
Hey all,
I hate to do this, I really do... I like having this blog open to the world. But I've been having a particularly ugly attack of comment spam lately -- including a bunch who are apparently doing it not to try and sell some pathetic product, but just because they can. ("You have a great site, but I am so sorry you have so much spam," they read.)
First of all, to the spammers... It's really too bad that you're all such gutless cowardly pissants that you hide behind comment spam. Guess that's what happens when adults spend their lives in diapers, huh? You're damn lucky, all of you, that I'll likely never meet you in person, or I'd have my foot so far down your throats you'd be passing my shoelaces.
To my regular readers... I've grown exasperated with having to delete 200 spamments a day, including about 25 now that make it past my filters. In one week, I am going to go to a moderated commenting system -- you'll have to be registered and authenticated to comment here. I really hate to do this to you, but I have no choice. I'm going to use TypeKey -- here's the link, so if you'd like to keep commenting (and I hope you do), please get a TypeKey ID. I figure a one week notice ought to be enough time to get everyone set up.
To my fellow bloggers... anyone have any luck elimintaing these nasty little trouser gnomes from earth -- I mean, from your sites? I've got a spamment infestation problem the size of Denver, so any hints would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks for understanding, everyone.
Posted by Christopher at 07:20 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBackJune 01, 2006
He's Back
About a month ago, I reluctantly removed my friend Ethan from my Blogroll because he hadn't updated his blog in months... of course, no sooner do I do this than I discover that he's fired up a new blog -- no longer hand-rolling his code but coming over to the dark side and hooking up with Blogspot.
I haven't talked as much with Ethan lately; he's been promoted and has a new gig that's taking up much of his attention, and of course I've been running around like a wombat with its head cut off for the last few months. So it's great to see his blog back up - it's a good way to see what's in his head these days and for me to continue to be simultaneously inspired and depressed by just how creative he is. Ethan... welcome back to blgotopia, man.
Anyway, back and in full force, I present Ethan's new blog.
Posted by Christopher at 08:07 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBackMay 24, 2006
The Bad 80s Video War Is... ON
It's amazing how something that started out so innocent can get so out of hand, isn't it?
It was just a simple post from my good friend Corey... pointing out Billy Squier's prance-fest in the video for "Rock Me Tonite." I pirated shamelessly from Corey's post and reposted it myself, along with a counter offering of Journey. Corey returned the favor and reposted that video. And suddenly Corey and I have found ourselves embroiled in a Bad 80s Video War.
I'll fire the next salvo... Corey, my friend, I dare you to top this: Falco's video for the original (German) version of "Der Kommissar." Game. Freaking. On.
Posted by Christopher at 09:27 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBackMay 19, 2006
What's In A Name?
So I'm getting ready to go on stage on Wednesday... I was on the keynote panel that opened the conference, and since the other panelists and I hadn't actually met in person yet, we decided to have breakfast together and just develop a face to face rapport before going on stage together. This was my first time on stage in Europe, and of course you want to make an impression... so I was dressed in my corporate American best -- Ralph Lauren pinstripe suit, Boss dress shirt (dark blue, though -- no white shirts on stage, I don't suck up that bad!), relatively conservative tie... I looked very much the representative of big business that I am when I go to these things. Besides, while two of my fellow panelists were from the blog world, the other two were corporate reps as well -- I figured they'd be dressed like me.
I got downstairs in the hotel, and made my way to the cafe. When I found my new friends, I realized that I was a) the only one in a suit; b) the only one not wearing at least something black. The group greeted me fondly, but quickly settled into giving me friendly hell for my choice of outfit.
"You don't look like a blogger," I was told. "You should go change."
Now, generally I am a casual guy by nature, and am much more comfortable dressed down than up. So it was almost a relief to run back upstairs, throw a black t-shirt and jeans on, put the pinstripe blazer on over it, and come back downstairs just in time to do the panel. No one was the wiser, and I probably looked more comfortable up there than I would have looked in the suit.
But the whole exchange got me thinking: just what the hell does a blogger look like, anyway?
If the whole point of blogging in general is that now the means of expression and for the sharing of expertise are in the hands of anybody who chooses to use said means (rather than only in the hands of those few with the financial and distributive resources to communicate), then wouldn't it follow that bloggers look like everybody? In which case, some bloggers will be dressed in black or jeans (or, in the case of one of the speakers from later in the day, a leather kilt)... while others would be dressed in suits... while others might blog in their pajamas? If we who blog come from all walks of the Net, why can't some of us be businesspeople who feel most comfortable in Ralph Lauren pinstripes?
I am more comfortable in a t-shirt and jeans, so I don't feel bad about having changed; I was comfortable. But I am disappointed that I allowed myself to be talked into it -- and in the mindset that somehow we have to conform to some avant-garde or hipster dress code in order to officially look like a blogger. If there's a uniform, it's not going to fit everyone.
Posted by Christopher at 07:01 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBackMay 09, 2006
Shout-Outs
Isn't the term "shout-out" so 2000? Why am I using it? (Especially given that I am 37 and not 19? Then again, if I were 19 I would probably know the more current term for publicly recognizing those deemed worthy of recognition.) Anyway, three lovely ladies of the blogosphere have been inspiring me of late, and I wanted to point you their way. Sometimes it's their subject choice; others it's the skill with which they've crafted the stories they've chosen to tell; still other times it's just respect for pure writing talent when I see it. While I've been wasting time crabbily grousing about Barry Bonds, each of them have been particularly worthy reading of late.
"Jane" over at Three New York Women has been on a roll lately. Her post on her relationship with her sister -- both as a young girl and now as an adult as her sister has come out -- was touching, human, and was crafted beautifully, arced around the plot point of taking her sister out to her first gay bar during a visit to Manhattan shortly after coming out (or, not coming out, exactly, but her realization that she was "just a heterosexual woman who has discovered I could also be attracted to lesbians. So I'm just exploring the idea now that my flirting and dating could be open to both men and lesbians."). It's a wonderful post. She followed it up with a somewhat tongue-in-cheek post about the challenges and emotional swings that come with being thirtysomething and being the last single holdout among a group of friends -- and then trading them in for a new set of single friends and watching them pair up and breed too. She's witty, she's poignant, and she's a hell of a writer. Jane, you're on a roll this week - nicely done!
"Liz" over at The Brain Dump visited my blog for the first time this week... and when I clicked over to check out her blog, I was taken by some highly personal, yet compelling and powerful posts. Her post entitled "O-R-E-O," specifically, though it's a couple of weeks old now, provided me with perspective on a life experience that I would never have -- being a black person growing up primarily among white people, then getting into high school and college and finding herself called "not black enough" by the black communities there, and her adjustment/coming to terms with this dynamic. Among the best things about blogging is the opportunity to read perspectives that you would otherwise never experience; Liz provides this articulately and entertainingly. Well done, Liz - and thanks for dropping by my corner of the blog world.
And last but not least... long-time friend of this blog and Curmudgeon favorite, Jill over at JillWrites, has been busy making me laugh. Playwright, poet, and all-around muse, Jill's been populating her blog this week with a few characters from plays she's in the middle of writing -- those characters just didn't feel like waiting for the play to be finished before speaking up. She's also done a very nice post on the relationships we bloggers end up having with our readers, the members of our communities whom we've never met yet have still become close to. Jill, my muse and comment banterer, I've been enjoying your stuff this week, even more than usual. (We still need to discuss my prize for being first to figure out Anais Nin, too.) :-)
Ladies... well done this week. Thanks for writing. And for everyone in my community, if you haven't clicked over to any of these three blogs yet, this'd be the week to do it. They're kicking out good stuff these days.
Posted by Christopher at 11:18 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBackApril 14, 2006
Goodbye, Mileah
I feel like I was kicked in the stomach this morning.
One of the truly rewarding things about having a blog is that you get to establish friendships with some of the people who read you. You exchange comments with someone for long enough, then someone sends an e-mail, and the next thing you know you feel like the person is a friend, even though you've never met them.
I just learned that one of my friends died last month.
This morning, while doing my usual perusal of my blogroll, it struck me that I hadn't seen an update on my friend Mileah's blog in a few weeks... and I realized that I hadn't seen her here commenting lately either. I clicked over to her blog, and found this sad entry announcing her death. From her hometown paper, the Austin Chronicle:
Mileah Jordan, logistics manager for Stubb's barbecue sauce division and former Liberty Lunch office manager, died overnight March 16 at her Austin apartment. The cause of death was unknown, but Jordan, 43, had had multiple health problems in recent years, said former boyfriend and neighbor Rob Cooley, who found her body the next morning. Jordan grew up in Abilene, studied art history at the University of Dallas, and moved to Austin in 1984.
I never met Mileah; we only sent an e-mail every now and then. We 'fessed up over where we each worked and what we did, we exchanged political rants and anger over the Bush regime, we sent the occasional greeting if we hadn't heard from one another in a while, and that was it. I don't want to overstate things; it's not like we had become mightily close or anything. But I still feel like I knew her. I'd been reading her blog (and blogrolling her) since the angry election campaign of 2004; she was a passionate advocate for her beliefs who loved her country and hated what was happening to it. But more than that, she loved music, she loved art, and she loved writing. She was a good soul. She was my friend.
I've been so focused on the craziness and hectic pace in my own life in the last few months that I haven't kept up with friends all that well... and so it is that here, almost a month later, I am just now learning that a friend of mine has died. I'm sorry, Mileah. I'm sorry that I didn't know until you'd been gone a month. I'm sorry that I didn't leave one last comment on your March 15 entry, the last one you ever wrote, to let you know I was still reading you. I'm sorry that I didn't send an e-mail just saying "I'm really busy right now, but just wanted to say hello." I'm sorry that you're gone, because my blog experience was better for your having been a part of it. Thanks for being there.
Goodbye, Mileah.
Posted by Christopher at 07:27 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBackMarch 01, 2006
The Highest Praise
Today (ay... ay...) I consider myself (...elf... elf...) the luckiest man (an.. an...) on the face of the Earth (...rth... rth..).
Other bloggers win Koufax awards or Bloggies or whatever... fine. They can keep 'em. They've never received any kind of acknowledgement like I received last night at the PiggyHawk household. Courtesy of Eden, here is the verbatim transcript of a conversation between Eden and her husband Hawk last night. (I sanitized a teensy bit, sorry for the prudery, Eden!)
Eden: "What are you looking at?"
Hawk, in front of computer: "Um..."
Eden: "[Breasteses?]"
Hawk: "Of course"
Eden: "Do you ever look at anything online anymore other than Mudge and p0rn?"
Hawk: "Is there anything else?"
Indeed, ladies and gentlemen: is there anything else? I mean, really? There's me... and there's p0rn. In that order, you'll notice.
In the long history of compliments among hominids and their descendants, stretching back 10,000+ years, there has never been a more beautiful or touching compliment. I come before p0rn.
Wait a second. Strike that.
Hawk, I am proud to be the supplemental reading to your online viewing routine. As long as you promise not to get the two confused...
Posted by Christopher at 06:12 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBackFebruary 27, 2006
Good News Sells
Post a link to some inspiring video of a story that is impossible to watch without feeling better about humanity and the world... and here's what happens to your blog's hit traffic:
I didn't post it looking for traffic, I was just inspired. But what's turning out to be just as inspiring is how many people are interested in this story... how many people have heard about Jason's feat and want to be part of it, even if just by watching the video. Thanks, Jason!
February 02, 2006
I Have Nothing To Say...
Empty.
This week, I've been reaching into my idea bag and finding nothing but dust bunnies... been spinning the giant Wheel Of Inspiration and landing on "Lose A Turn"... rolling the idea dice and coming up snake eyes... dipping into the creativity tank and finding I'm on fumes.
I have nothing to say.
Could that be? Me, who's never without an opinion he's just itching to share? Who's always deluding himself into believing he's funny and trying to toss out snarky thoughts or wisecracks? Who's made a living out of being the one who can come up with things to say? I'm the guy who's run out of ideas?
Sad but true. I suppose I could blame work; I'm on a new project that is both extremely daunting and extremely challenging (in the good way), and a lot of my creativity is getting channeled into it. So maybe trying to blog as the Mudge right now is like trying to hit the treadmill for a 30 minute jog after having just run the Boston Marathon. Or maybe it's just because between work and this site, I'm immersed in blogging for what feels like 24/7, the very word follows me around like a lost puppy, the lines between the professional me and the personal me are continuing to blur uncomfortably, and I'm just burned out on blogging for the moment. Maybe I'm just having a bad week. Maybe aliens came down from the planet Zepton and caught me without my tinfoil hat, and thus were able to use their super secret sucking ray to drain the creativity from my brain. Whatever the reason, my idea place is a bg giant echo chamber right now.
I'd say it's time to drop out for a while and restock my shelves, let the tank refill... but I pulled that stunt once already and so even doing that would be unoriginal. I think I'll just load up some blues on the iPod (courtesy of The Roadhouse), and turn it over to you guys. (And yes, I know that with readers like Beav and the Doc, I'm really asking for trouble here!) What do you guys want to read about? What do you think my next blog posts should be? Maybe this could be an exercise in creativity -- this weekend, I will write a post on every subject that gets suggested in the comments to this post. (I'll just ask you to please keep in mind that as I alluded earlier, my pseudo-anonymity is fading fast and people are beginning to connect this site to the professional me, so please don't be setting me up to blog about something that will cause professional embarrassment!) But - be the topic serious or frivilous, sarcastic or idealistic, one you take home to mother or one you just take home... this weekend, my blog belongs to you.
(Putting on my best goony radio DJ for a teenage top 40 station voice): "It's an all request weekend here on K-MUDGE... give us a call at 555-3825 and let me know what YOU want to hear!"
I leave you for now with a paraphrase of the monologue by the immortal Christopher Walken in "Pulp Fiction":
The way your Mudge looked at it, this blog was your birthright. He'd be damned if any of the slumps were gonna get their greasy tapped-out hands on his readers' birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this blog up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the blog. I hid this uncomfortable piece of Movable Type up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little readers, I give the blog to you.
Looking forward to seeing what you come up with, guys.
Posted by Christopher at 06:40 AM | Comments (19) | TrackBackJanuary 28, 2006
Shout-Outs
Yeah, I know it's a dated phrase. Shut up.
Just wanted to throw out a couple of blogs for recognition... first of all, "Reports From Abroad" is a blog by a college junior who is the son of a friend of mine at work and the brother of frequent commenter and occasional Mudge-ripper Sarah (more on her in a second). Daniel is spending the first eight months of 2006 studying abroad in Germany. His blog's a fun read -- beyond the college experience and the living abroad experience, you also get a great set of trial-and-error reviews of German beer. Good read from a perceptive guy; worth your time checking out.
As for Sarah, she's gotten herself a radio show at her college. Sarah and I have plenty of playful banter about her taste in music -- her father (who is a friend and reads this blog occasionally) has warped her mind with too much 60s and 70s stuff ;-) , and she and I will never agree on Led Zeppelin (I'm right, by the way... they're overrated, drug-addled wailers) -- but all joking aside, it's a hell of an accomplishment for anyone to get their own radio show... and at 18, I think I'd have been in absolute heaven if someone gave me a few hours on the air every week to inflict myself upon the world. Sarah, having your own show is a hell of a thing... good for you, and lemme know when you get some of your programming streaming on the Web.
And last but not least, I wanted to call your attention to someone who I blogrolled a few weeks ago, but whose writing is deserving of a special call-out. Jill over at JillWrites is a really thoughtful writer (even teaches writing) and is a pretty creative person. I've really enjoyed reading her stuff in the last few weeks. If you think of me as something like a Farelly Brothers/Tim Robbins mix (except not as funny as them and not as satirical as him), Jill's something like a Nora Ephron -- I get the sense that someday she's going to write something like a hippier, far sexier version of "When Harry Met Sally." In other words, she's a lot more thoughtful and nuanced than I am (me of the lead feather-style bludgeoning with my points). I enjoy her, and think you will too.
Posted by Christopher at 12:01 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBackJanuary 21, 2006
Movin' On Up
According to Technorati, there are 25.9 million blogs in the world. Also according to Technorati's ranking system, The Chronic Curmudgeon is the 98,016th most popular blog in the world.
Ten percent of 25.9 million is 2.59 million. 1% of 25.9 million is 259,000. Half of that -- 0.5% -- is 129,500. I am 98,016th. In other words, I am in the top 0.4% of the world's most popular bloggers.
My mom always said I was special.
Posted by Christopher at 11:08 AM | Comments (11) | TrackBackJanuary 16, 2006
De-Lurking: It's Not Just For Breakfast Anymore
Eden did it. So did Pete. And now, because I can be frighteningly sheep-like at times with the originality of a Hollywood producer, I'm doing it. "It," of course, is observing National De-Lurking Week. Granted, technically it was last week, but I'm just getting around to it.
Anyway, what is De-Lurking? Simple: there's a lot of people who read others' blogs who just read, but either never comment at all (i.e., "lurk"), or only comment once in a blue moon. De-Lurking is the process by which we bloggers appeal to the better angels of these lurkers' nature, and ask them to expose themselves. NO, not that way! (Well, maybe.... depends on what you look like, I guess.)
Granted, I don't have the readership that I did pre-hiatus, nor do I come close to Pete-like or Eden-like audience levels... but Site Meter tells me that there's a few of you coming in regulalry who haven't sounded off. So today, let us know you're here. Say hello. Tell me your favorite song, or what the weather's like today where you are. Just say something. Please. De-Lurk. Your mother would want you to. It will make you run faster and jump higher. It's good for your libido.
January 09, 2006
He's Ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-ck
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water... dunh dun... dunh dun... dun-dun-dun-dun, dun-dun-dun-dun, dun-dun-duh-DUNNNN...
Yes, our old friend the Doc, who'd relegated himself to the occasional attempts to be funny in my comment field, has returned to blogtopia after more than a year away (during which I can only assume he, er, amused himself in ways we'd all prefer not to think about). SpinMD is back -- drop by and give him a shout, will ya?
Not only is he back, but he's back with a bang. (No, not that kind of bang. Get your minds out of the gutter.) He did a post just before New Year's, right when it was announced that Michael Vale -- the guy from those old "Time to make the donuts" commercials for Dunkin Donuts -- had passed away at 83. Ol' Doc suggested that perhaps Dunkin Donuts ought to do a memorial commercial for Mr. Vale.
Fast forward a week. Saturday Night Live is on, and all of a sudden, Michael Vale's walking out of his house half-asleep, muttering 'time to make the donuts." After about 20 seconds of all the old commercials, they faded to white, and showed the words, "He didn't just make the donuts... he made us smile. In Memoriam: Michael Vale (1922-2005)." Which was not only touching, but was pretty much the commercial Doc had described/concepted/suggested a week earlier. Do ad agencies scour the blog planet looking for ideas? Maybe they do -- at least the Doc's ideas anyway. Kinda cool, I thought.
Posted by Christopher at 08:28 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBackNovember 03, 2005
Quick update
No, I'm not getting really lazy with the blatant pitch to win that contest. As fate would have it, work has picked up a bit this week, and time to blog's been a little scarce. I'll be back on tonight with some new posts.
Posted by Christopher at 04:38 AM | Comments (4)October 27, 2005
I'll Show You Mine If You Show Me Yours!
Got this idea from the Linkmeister, and it's kind of a cool little toy. Because it's fun to know where the people who read you are coming from (anyone else seeing a blue-state-loaded distribution coming for me?), I'm all about this new thing from Frappr that lets your blog's readers sign in and put a pin on the map telling you where they're coming from.. So please... do me a favor. Satisfy my curiousity. Sign in here to the Curmudgeon Community, and sound off. Who are you, and where's home?
Posted by Christopher at 11:08 PM | Comments (6)October 19, 2005
Say Hello To...
The Linkmeister. He is a baseball fan, which automatically gains him entry to my blogroll and recommended list. His own blogroll has plenty of lefty links, which automatically makes him one of the good guys. And his posts are a mix of sports, pop culture, technology, and snippets of his own life.
Linkmeister comes to us all the way from Hawaii. That's about 10,000 miles from our friend and TCC regular McRob over at The Bothy. Which means that my plan to spread my gospel and take over the entire world via blogs is now approximately halfway complete. Mwoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hah-hah-hah-hah!!!!!
Posted by Christopher at 07:51 PM | Comments (1)October 15, 2005
Milestone: 1000th Entry
More than two years ago now, I finally gave in to my early adopter friends who kept pushng me in the direction of this new thing "everyone" was doing, called blogging. I'd be a natural for it, they said. I checked into it and thought, "What the hell - why not? It'll be nice to have a place to write about something other than business."
Fast forward 27 months. Today, this very post you're reading right now is the 1000th entry by the Chronic Curmudgeon. 1000 entries... 1000 seems to be a nice, round number -- perfect for the kind of navel-gazing self-congratulatory post that I'm not going to write. I've done the "I started this thing up as an outlet and look what happened" post -- in fact, I've done it more than once -- and I won't subject you to it again.
I will say, however, that I'm grateful for the unexpected roads this thing has led me down. Through this blog, I've become friends with people from central Florida to Houston to Los Angeles to Erie, and many other places -- along with reconnecting with family back in Minnesota I'd sort of drifted out of touch with. Hell, in the most amazing development of 'em all, it was this blog that got me promoted at work this spring into a dream gig that's turned into the break of a lifetime, a job in which I literally learn somethng new every day, and one that's brought me more attention and accolades than I'm probably worth. I started this thing as a place to hack around and anonymously vent, and it got me the job that's pushed me over the top in my career trajectory and put me into a suit. How messed up is that? Alternately, how cool is that?
Thanks for reading, everyone.
Posted by Christopher at 11:19 AM | Comments (6)September 25, 2005
Hooray For Boobies
It's rare that I get a chance to combine my inner 13 year old's endless search for a cheap thrill with a good cause. So when the opportunity presents itself, far be it from me to not capitalize on the moment.
Next Saturday, the fourth annual bloggers' BoobieThon will begin, benefitting the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation (along with the American Red Cross this year). It's a simple concept, really; bloggers submit photos of their upper torso regions to the site to raise (ahem) awareness of and money for breast cancer research. Clothed or semi-covered shots go on BoobieThon's main page; those viewers willing to make a $50 contribution are given access to a private page where they can find photos from those brave enough to bare their assets for the cause.
Since 2002, BoobieThon has raised more than $17,000 for breast cancer research. Their tagline, "We Share To Make You Care," cracks me up - but their issue is quite serious. I hope you care enough to make some sort of donation during the campaign. Do it for your wives, girlfriends, mothers, daughters, and the men who love them.
(My inner 13 year old would like to mention that any of my female readers who've "shared to make us care" can feel free to make me aware of their efforts. The pics are anonymized and don't show faces anyway, so it's not like I would know which ones were yours... but it would make for a fun parlor game for me while I spend my $50. Leave a comment below or e-mail me at thechroniccurmudgeon@hotmail.com; photos encouraged.
My cheap thrill banter aside, it's a great cause and a chance to do some good. Here's to a successful 2005 campaign.
Posted by Christopher at 11:27 PM | Comments (12)August 27, 2005
7 Things
Lifted this from Eden's blog. Here's the 7 Things meme:
7 Things I plan to do before I die:
Get in the recording studio and cut a vanity CD
Leave New York
Write my novel
Move to an island or someplace in the Caribbean/Gulf of Mexico
Run a marathon
Take a vacation here
Run for office
7 Things I cannot do:
Pee and sneeze at the same time
Resist a remote control
Vote for a conservative
Drink tequila*
Any math more advanced than basic add/subtract/multiply/divide
Understand the appeal of NASCAR
Stand reality television or understand people who like it
* Seriously. I'm deathly allergic to it. One shot, and within 15 minutes my face breaks out in a rash, my throat swells and closes off, I'm unconscious, and you're speeding me to the emergency room.
7 Things I can do:
-- Cook a fabulous balsamic chicken w/raspberry glaze, with a lemon risotto, grilled shrimp in homemade mint pesto as an appetizer, and a homemade coconut cream pie for dessert
-- See the difference between a fastball and a breaking ball simply by the way the ball leaves the pitcher's hand
-- Sing country smoothly enough that southerners don't know I'm a Yankee
-- Give some of the world's best backrubs
-- Write - be it stories, columns, or speeches
-- Walk and chew gum at the same time
-- Order a beer in six languages
7 Things that attract me to the opposite sex:
A warped/snarky/dark sense of humor
Intelligence
Eyes
Being petite (I've never understood my thing for short girls, but I have a serious thing for them)
Unpredictability/spontaneity
Lack of inhibition
A great derriere
7 Things I say most often:
My own name (answering the phone constantly at work)
"I gotta get out of New York, man."
"Dude"
"One more round?"
"@!#*-ing Red Sox!" (alternately, "They don't have the pitching to repeat this year.")
"Someday"
"A blog is..." (One of the roles I have now in my job is helping lead my company's drive to get our employees blogging; at least once a week I speak or present to some group of our people around the world who have probably heard of blogs but don't yet fully know what they are. When you've been writing one for a couple of years, you forget that lots of the rest of the world thinks they're new and doesn't know much about them.)
7 Celebrity crushes:
Jennifer Love Hewitt
Catherine Bell
Chris Jansing
Brittany Murphy
Mary Louise Parker
Liz Phair
Tina Fey
August 20, 2005
Marco... Polo!
This here's a shout out to a new blog who's linked to me (many thanks for the link!), The Adventures of Marco Polo in Baton Rouge. I think it's very safe to say that Marco represents the only time I have ever been on the same blogroll as Michelle Malkin; I'm not sure what to even think of that. I think it may be one of the signs of the apocolypse, so if you also see Jurgen Prochnow and Demi Moore nearby, you might want to take shelter.
Thanks for the link, Marco. And for anyone interested in the Louisiana perspective of the world, go check Marco out and tell him hello.
Posted by Christopher at 11:59 AM | Comments (0)July 24, 2005
Corey's Meme
Corey put a meme up on his blog. Here's my version.
1. LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATER: It's been so long I honestly don't remember. I think it might have been "Meet The Fockers."
2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? I just finished "The Secret Man," Woodward's memoir of his relationship with his Watergate source. Next is "Stormy Weather" by Carl Hiassen.
3. WHAT WERE YOU DOING JUST MINUTES AGO? Watching the Cardinals and Cubs on ESPN.
4. FAVORITE MAGAZINE? Bon Appetite, ESPN the magazine, FHM.
5. FAVORITE SMELLS? The ocean, the beach, coconut, a woman's skin (shut up, women just smell really good!), French fries at the beach (you know, the ones crisped in oil and then drenched in malt vinegar), lime, the air just before a real midwestern thunderstorm hits.
6. FAVORITE FOODS? Scallops (especially wrapped in bacon), mussels, conch fritters, sushi, pulled pork in BBQ sauce, hot dogs, just about anything with lime in it, pineapple, raw oysters with cocktail sauce and horseradish.
7. FAVORITE SOUNDS? Ocean waves. Seagulls. The sound a baseball makes when the hitter gets the meat of the bat on it and drives it 400 feet. Little kids when they get the giggles. The fizzy sound when you open a can of something carbonated. Rain.
8. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD? Those last five seconds before you throw up, when your mouth is watering wildly and your stomach is just beginning to spasm violently, and you know it's coming.
9. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP? Hit the snooze bar. Just ten more minutes!
10. FAVORITE FAST FOOD PLACE? Five Guys burgers in Virginia; or just about any roadside hot dog stand.
11.FUTURE CHILD'S NAME? Chase, Cassidy.
12. FINISH THIS STATEMENT. "IF I HAD A LOT OF MONEY..." I would own a home in the Caribbean somewhere (St. Lucia? British Virgins? Turks & Caicos?), one in Spain, a luxury boat, I’d travel a lot, and none of my friends would ever pay for a vacation again.
13. DO YOU DRIVE FAST? Depends on how you define "fast." I usually go about 75 mph on open road.
14. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Only if it's over 18. Actually, I sleep with four or five pillows.
15. STORMS-COOL OR SCARY? Very. Freaking. Cool.
16. Describe YOUR FIRST CAR? A drab green 1970 Nova. That car had more balls than anything I've owned since - was incredibly powerful.
17. FAVORITE DRINK? Just one? Grey Goose martini, dirty; pina coladas; and Caribbean Breezes (coconut rum, vodka, orange juice, grenadine)
18. FINISH THIS STATEMENT, "IF I HAD THE TIME I WOULD": a) finish my novel; b) get to the gym more.
19. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS ON BROCCOLI? I don't even eat the leafy part. Broccoli's nasty.
20. IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR CHOICE? Electric blue. Or maybe plum.
21. NAME ALL THE DIFFERENT CITIES/TOWNS YOU HAVE LIVED IN: Jersey City NJ, Honolulu HI, Richfield MN, Coon Rapids MN, Minneapolis MN, Orlando FL, Washington DC, Arlington VA, Boston MA, Wappingers Falls NY, Delray Beach FL, Yonkers NY
22. FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH? Baseball.
23. ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU... Corey's one hell of a columnist, and hopefully the Baltimore Sun is smart enough to figure out that they could have the next big thing. I also like that he calls BS on me when I have it coming.
24. WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED? A pair of 25 lb dumbbells, a Rand McNally atlas of the world, and more dust bunnies than there are Smiths in the US white pages.
25. TOILET PAPER/PAPER TOWEL-OVER OR UNDER? Under, though I never really thought about it till just now.
26 MORNING PERSON, OR NIGHT OWL? Hoot, Hoot. Night owl. Big time. I usually hit my stride between 9-11 pm. And I hate getting up in the morning. When I am elected president, mornings will be outlawed by executive order. The work day will officially start at 11:00 am.
27. OVER EASY, OR SUNNY SIDE - Over easy.
28. FAVORITE PLACE TO RELAX! Any beach will do; put it in the Caribbean and make it a bar on the beach, and I will never leave.
29. FAVORITE PIE? At the risk of going all hair band and juvenile, cherry pie. Also key lime pie.
30. OF ALL THE PEOPLE WHO WILL SEE THIS WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO DUPLICATE: I dunno. Eden?
31. LEAST LIKELY? Doc
Posted by Christopher at 09:59 PM | Comments (8)June 07, 2005
I've Been Tagged
Jillian over at The Snarky Cat “tagged” me for a meme… and damn it to hell, I can't resist these stupid things. Jillian, I'll get you back… someday, I shall get you back! In the meantime, here's my answers.
Three names you go by:
Christopher, Chris, Topher (that one's a stretch and you've got to give me mighty good reasons to let you call me that, but from a select few it's okay)
Three screen names you've had:
Mudge, Xtopher, Heat (don't ask)
Three physical things you like about yourself:
1. My eyes (hazel to green, depending on my mood)
2. My laugh -- is that physical? When I get a giggle fit, whoever's in the room with me will invariably get caught in it, it's contagious.
3. I dunno... arms, I guess? These are silly questions.
Three physical things you don't like about yourself:
1. I have a well-earned, somewhat shrinking but still way too prodigious beer belly.
2. I have tree trunk legs even when I'm fit and in shape (catchers end up building up thighs and low centers of gravity, and it sticks with you long after you stop playing baseball).
3. My thinning hair; I have that annoying male pattern baldness thing starting to kick in on the top of my head, and I think it's just a matter of time before my follicles say uncle.
Three parts of your heritage:
Lithuanian, German, Dutch. (But I am a true American mutt in the finest sense of the word, there's like a half dozen more floating around in my blood somewhere.)
Three things you are wearing right now:
Ralph Lauren pinstriped suit; Hugo Boss dress shirt, Jerry Garcia tie
Three favorite bands: (if Jillian didn’t have to stick to three, then I don‘t either.)
Stevie Ray Vaughan, U2, Jimmy Buffett, Solomon Burke, Johnny Cash, Guns-N-Roses, George Strait, Blake Shelton, Buddy Guy, The Ramones, Brad Paisley, Albert King, Albert Collins, Green Day, Rage Against The Machine, Toby Keith (I hate his persona and politics, but god help me I like his songs), The White Stripes
Three favorite songs:(again… Jillian gave herself like 48 of them, so I gave myself the same amount.)
Always The Last To Know (Del Amitri), Amarillo By Morning (George Strait), Bark At The Moon (Ozzy Osbourne), Basket Case (Green Day), Bat Out Of Hell (Meatloaf), Beautiful Girl (INXS), Beer For My Horses (Toby Keith and Willie Nelson), Black (Pearl Jam), Born Under A Bad Sign (Albert King), Bother (Stone Sour), Boulevard of Broken Dreams (Green Day), Break Down Here (Julie Roberts), Celebrity (Brad Paisley), Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes (Jimmy Buffett), Click Click Boom (Saliva), Couldn't Stand The Weather (Stevie Ray Vaughan), C.R.E.A.M. (Wu-Tang Clan),18 And Life (Skid Row), Elevation (U2), Everybody's Got a Cousin in Miami (Jimmy Buffett), Fire And Rain (James Taylor), Galveston (Glen Campbell), Heart Shaped Box (Nirvana), H.W.C. (Liz Phair), It Makes No Difference (Solomon Burke), It's 5:00 Somewhere (Alan Jackson and Jimmy Buffett), Life By The Drop (Stevie Ray Vaughan), Life Without You (Stevie Ray Vaughan), Lot Of Leavin' Left To Do (Dierks Bentley), Mack The Knife (Bobby Darin), Master Of Puppets (Metallica), Mercy Mercy Me (Marvin Gaye), On Broadway (George Benson), Open Season... Is Closed (HepCat), Papa Was A Rollin' Stone (The Temptations), Peace Sells... (Megadeth), Ride (The Vines), Rock Superstar (Cypress Hill), She Talks To Angels (Black Crowes), Superstition (Stevie Ray Vaughan), Surrender (Cheap Trick), Sweet Child O' Mine (Guns-N-Roses), The Impression That I Get (Mighty Mighty Bosstones), Vertigo (U2), Video Killed The Radio Star (The Buggles), What Was I Thinkin' (Dierks Bentley), When The Sun Goes Down (Kenny Chesney and Uncle Cracker), Whiskey Girl (Toby Keith)
Three things you want in a relationship:
1. Sense of humor - she's gotta be able to laugh at herself, at me, at life, and to not take any of the above seriously.
2. Honesty/trust
3. A wild side. 'Nuff said.
Three things about the preferred sex that appeal to you:
1. Eyes. A woman with beautiful eyes can get me to do just about anything.
2. In the immortal words of Cosmo Kramer, "I'm the Ass Man!" Of all the traditional physical attributes that men check out on women, a good derriere is far and away the thing that makes my knees buckle and gets me to make that drooling sound Homer Simpson makes when he sees a donut.
3. Brains. You can only deal with an empty head for so long, no matter how great the body attached to it is - and I love the challenge and stimulation (no pun intended) of a smart woman's mind.
Other things that will get me to look twice or raise an eyebrow or say, "Hmmm...": sundresses, longer hair (not down to the ass long, just shoulder length or just above the shoulders) a woman who drinks a beer every so often instead of wine or fruity drinks, ponytails, and for some reason I have never figured out I am a sucker for petite women -- instead of the 5'10" runway model, give me a 5'2" or 5'4" gymnast or ice skater type. A short girl gets me every time.
Three of your favorite hobbies:
Writing, music, baseball.
Three things you want to do really badly right now:
Get out of this suit and into casual clothes, finish this meme, go to sleep.
Three things that scare you:
Heights. Bridges. What conservatives want to do to this country.
Three of your everyday essentials:
Coffee. Newsgator. AOL IM.
Three careers you have considered/are considering:
Politician. Novelist. Restauranteur/business owner.
Three places you want to go on vacation:
St. Lucia. Tuscany. British Virgin Islands.
Three kids' names you like:
Jack, Chase, Noah. (m)
Sydney, Chloe, Cassidy. (f)
Three ways you are stereotypically a boy:
I love sports and can watch almost any sport on TV. I have a dirty mind and often share my thoughts whether it's appropriate or not. I don't go to the doctor unless I can't walk or there's blood coming from somewhere it shouldn't be.
Three ways you are stereotypically a girl:
I am a clothes horse. I like fruity alcohol drinks more than beer. I like cats.
Three celebrity crushes:
Jennifer Love Hewitt, Liz Phair, Diane Lane.
Three to tag:
I'm not gonna put that kind of pressure on anyone. Do it if you wish, don't do it if you don't.
